what do you mean I googled how to give an awesome blow job?
Her vagina smelled like hockey gear.
All I did today at work was try to remember in vivid detail what your cock looks like.
woke up next to her writing my name in some journal. apparently she makes every guy she hooks up with sign out.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just saw a half naked, drunk, 6th grade math teacher throwing small children around to the Titanic soundtrack.
What kind of wedding is this and why wasn't I invited
I woke up at 4 am to my roomate peeing all over my clean laundry. He thought he was in the bathroom and yelled at me for being in the bathroom with him while he was peeing.
Aaaand I cut your bangs with a large knife last night ...
God she is annoying. I am only keeping her around on fb because I want to see if her baby comes out looking like an alien or not.
She makes me want to eat babies and throw kittens in pots of boiling water.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We had to go to his parents last night for dinner & ended up having a quickie in the bathroom while everyone else was outside smoking.. This is why we have a successful marriage.
He got hotter. I'm offended on behalf of the rest of our graduating year.
You keep making the old jokes & I'm gonna come down with a sudden case of low-estrogen related vaginal dryness..
LOL he's a hopeless romantic now? 🤔 I'd say giving him a bj in a freakin softball dugout isn't the most romantic thing but it still happened
high I am. I am yoda. Yoda I am
Southwest doesn't have zingzang bloody Mary mix. I'm gonna file a complaint with the FAA
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