Do you have any cake mix? I kind of need to make a "im sorry i drank all your parents tequila, threw up all over your floor and slept with you boyfriend" cake.
i'm wearing my white shorts to coax my period out of hiding.
I'm really starting to miss his dick. Like so much I'm actually tempted to try and work things out with him again.
God my Facebook chat is a graveyard of old blowjobz
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i told him i should keep a toothbrush at his house for after all the times i threw up there. he said yes but i wasnt getting a key to the apt
And dont forget my 23rd birthday where with no underwear i crawled through the cage of the police car. Dont get drunk be fore you get drunk.
am i so blindsided by his great personality that i'm hooking up with an ugly guy?
i thought you knew
Fantastic. I'm pretty cold, tired, dirty, and hungry, but that comes with an adventurous weekend. Who needs a wallet or keys anyway? I could totally be homeless.
On the 3rd day, she mixed sangria and orange juice and saw that it was good.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It was a book called Gay Safari.
I'm so happy for you now that you have found your perfect porn novel.
Not to mention I think lunch is a little inappropriate when our relationship is only based on Mario kart and alcohol so far...
A 74 year old man offered to let me sleep on his pull out couch last night.
Ok, stop saying "youths." You're 23.
Question: how does one descretely ask the ice cream truck driver thats out at 10:00pm if he sells weed?
I smell like beef jerky
That's among the sexiest things you've ever said to me.
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