i would really appreciate it if you would stop texting my girlfriend.
i would really appreciate it if you would stop cock blocking me.
There's a vagina buried somewhere in there.
Its Shannon Doherty lazy not Forest Whittaker lazy
The required reading for this week is a paper about birds called great tits. Let's see my TA keep a straight face through this discussion.
21 People Confess What It’s Really Like At An Orgy
He told me I couldn't drink an unopened bottle of water he had in his room because that was his emergency bong water
He just stabbed two olives and a pickle with a fork and deep throated it in front of my family
Not even marginally surprised
If I brought two seashells to Lowe's, do you think that they'd drill two holes in each shell for me? I need to be a mermaid on Saturday...
Im watching him eat cream cheese and hot dog buns.
I'm more concerned about the fact that I can't feel my gums
These 15 Honest Illustrations Show What Women Do When No One Is Watching
Just successfully went through airport security with shrooms. It's gonna be a fucking awesome new years
"So you think you can dance" turned into "so you think you can run and slide across the bar"...Jack Daniels wins
its not like i called off work either time for the purpose of tripping, it was more like well, i have nothing to do now today, there is acid and im only human.. but twice
I had to reschedule my trainer meeting so now I'm just here eating hot pockets
gin. gin. Gin. GIN GIN GINGINFFdJH
The medical term is prolapsed anal walls if you want to look into it with dignity.