I fucked **** last night, don't tell mike
this is mike. we're done.
mornings like this make me wish i was morman.
AIM automatically accepts video chats on my laptop. I found this out when I got a text from Jacob after my first attempt at drunk lesbian sex saying, "I'd give it a 7. You need to work on your positioning." I think I'm single now.
I shaved my pubes to make my cock look like it has a lions mane. to surprise the girl that works at the zoo when she comes over.
he gave me an orgasm. multiple times. the weird stuff he did in middle school is now irrelevant.
I Just realized that having a picture folder that says "not for mom" may give off the wrong impression to wondering eyes
his profile picture is a blurry one of him holding a beer. i recognized him instantly.
we have 69 mutual friends...i have to add her
He didn't seem too mad about the puke on the side of his car. You still have a chance.
oh yea it is. i was not expecting to look at a snowbank and just see flying mushrooms
Think of where it's been though. That Dr. Suess book, "Oh the Places You'll go" was written for his penis.
We played Rock Paper Scissors to see who would have to go down on the other person.
Well I shit myself on the way home from work today so there's that...
First. I had the strength. Now. I am the death.
they call themselves the foursome.. thats def means they're up for one right?
Randomize