they thought it would be fun to get out their yearbook and see who hooked up with the most guys..I won...I don't even go to the same school
I always wonder when I meet a guy from online if he needs a moment to mentally register and accept the size of my ass. maybe ill wear a dress.
This guy has a retainer. We're golden.
he said i'm too pretty to suck penis
He told me he could read braille... with his tongue. So I took him home. I don't think he was lying
Im drunk and they're making me play quiet game. Im scared. Baptists are here
On the bright side, I hit her with the door on the way in
I experienced pure joy just moments ago when I looked down and saw that I had another pop tart to consume down my mouth hole.
I've wasted nicer days than this hungover and dry heaving in bed.
If you don't sing me a lullaby then I'll just take shots till I pass out
Worst case scenario, I put a giant cork in your vagina so you don't give birth before my birthday
Just so you know, classy bitches change the morning after in a CVS bathroom.
My heart is swelling with pride right now. I fucking love you.
The friend zone. He put me in the friend zone. But said he still wants me to suck his dick. I'm in the dick sucking friend zone and I want to die.
I did a kegel this morning to determine if I had been penetrated during last night's blackout. Nope.
We have GOT to stop getting stoned and going out for expensive dinners.
Randomize
