Well you will be happy to know that aaron carter hit on me
Thats cool. we found a cat INSIDE a coke machine.
I think I would be able to remember how to smoke but I can't seem to remember how to breathe.
i never thought it was possible to fit gay, redneck and asian into the same sentence before i met you.
and this wasn't even the first one i'd hooked up with
we found his I.D. in the upstairs bathroom...under a towel in a hidden pile of snacks from her kitchen
he was too drunk to climb up my loft. i owe my beating teen pregnancy to four pieces of steel
I had a face to face conversation with her vagina, asking it not to make me look bad.
As long as you don't want to make a shrine out of my eyelashes It's all good
Next think I knew I was pretty much using his penis as a microphone... No more playing Eminem during hookups
It was like we had a conversation with our eyes.
Was it a good conversation?
It was an awkward, sexual conversation.
I feel like you're the reason public nudity is illegal and generally frowned upon in society
well smoking weed has become a deal breaker for me so I pretty much use "let's go smoke a blunt" as an icebreaker
would you like to venture to the magical clitoris forest?
So apparently my mom hired someone who goes by "DJ Dog Dick" for the family christmas party?
I WOULD NEVER MIX DICK AND MCDONALDS
Randomize
