So Jesus turned water into wine. So what? I once turned a whole student loan into natty light. Your move holy man.
They just gave us root beer floats. I guess I won't quit my job today.
terrible decisions. terrible terrible terrible decisions.
who'd you have sex with.
They wouldn't serve more then two Shots per person, so you grabbed a group of strangers and said u werre buying them all shots, then proceeded to drink all of them.
OH MY GOD I CAN'T WAIT TO BONE YOUR EX BOYFRIEND. HOW AWKWARD IS THIS?
They ran out of ice at the party, so I fixed my drink with frozen broccoli....the show must go on!
First memory of my senior year: Going into registration still drunk from last night.
so I guess I made a note in my phone last night to remind myself not to do shrooms on the cruise ship
I have to shave my legs first. I'm afraid tiny woodland creatures will fly out if he tries touches them.
We played Rock Paper Scissors to see who would have to go down on the other person.
... and smoked a joint with my new landlord. I'm starting to like Germany.
We just took an Eskimo family picture.. It's pretty cute honestly
Would I be crazy if I drove 1,000 miles for some dick? What mile does it become ridiculous?
And here I am, playing fetch with my cat at two in the morning.
You left your pants here again. 4th time in a row. How can you walk home without pants?
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