I dont abuse you, i just hit you while we have sex
Is it weird if i grunt like Tim Taylor when im having sex AND grilling steaks??
his personality makes his face look like an asshole.
I drunkenly recorded an episode of Family Matters last night. I took a shot everytime Carl Winslow had a mustache.
You're like the curious george of whores
The one wearing a viking helmet and holding a bottle of Smirnoff. She's laying on the floor of the tube singing "cant find my way home" . You can't miss her..
I'm by the dj to the left. Come get me now this girl is talking about baby names and I dnt even no hers
I can't see you
I'm the only one that's wearing a tarzan outfit get your ass over here you douche
You were carrying around a milk crate, randomly putting it down calling out 'praise be to the milk gods' and making people pray to it.
I'm going to shower the piss off me now. I feel like I was in an R. Kelly dream.
Things were easy when he was just a penis. Now he's a penis with feelings.
I've got mace and a condom. Ready to roll either way and keeping my pimp hand strong.
My aunt comes over, haven't seen her in 4 years. First thing, looks me up and down and goes "...yup, that pair ripened nicely. Theyll get you some free drinks"
I think you were raised by the wrong sister
What exactly is it about Doctor Who thigh high socks with a matching shirt that says "take me I'm yours!"
The candles are lit, the magic circle is drawn, now all we need to do is get naked and see how many orgasms we can manage.
What a better way to celebrate that I'm single by becoming a stripper and making $1000 in one night
Randomize
