found out what b.m.t stands for.
what did you think?
bread, meat, tomatoes, but then i realized that could be practically any sub.
im sorry i didnt take advantage of you..iwaned to
i wanted you to too
he said he didn't have a condom.
and you said?
that that's fine cause i was ready to be a mom. yeah - he magically had a condom he forgot about after that.
What can I say...he's packing some serious heat down there. You wouldn't expect that looking at him, huh?
I guess God knew he was going to be bald...
He came in the heat vent in my car. Don't ask how it happened.
Your mom is more observant then Randy Newman.
Is it sad that when she told me he has a small peen I felt like it made us more compatible?
Look, all I'm sayin is $2 boilermakers and an expense account are probably a bad mix…
Going to get a "plan B"urrito
I think I'm finally maturing. I'm happy he found someone. Good for him. I sincerely hope she doesn't choke on his tiny penis.
Your list of "good ideas" thumbtacked to the lampshade last night consisted of nothing but "tampon-pen" with a note indicating that girls could then always have something to write with, even naked.
All I remember is intermittent flashes of being passed out on the side of the road 3 or 4 different times. And telling him to just leave me there and I would walk home in the morning.
I just kept screaming "I'm fucking a preacher's son!" Also, this water tastes like weed.
You told me you had two boobs that want to be naked for me. I'm just following up on your request.
Me my naked body. You bring the paints. I expect to be a panther by game time Sunday.
What do I get.
Panthers win you get to fuck the paint off me.
Randomize
