i puked in the mini-firdge
we don't have a mini-fridge?
bought one. it ws too cheap to pass up. xcept now there's puke in it,,, but the freezer's fine so i feel pretty good about that
Walk of Shame. In a state park.
he is so obsessed with the fact that he works at Apple
i know, its like he jerks off to steve jobs
I hope that the reason I've been psycho on him is that I'm pregnant and not just psycho.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i just learned how to squirt via google. life is good.
idk if you're aware of this...but we could potentially have the greatest hate sex...ever.
You're sure you don't want to come? I'm pretty sure there is going to be "Pin the Tail on the Baby".
That's science, my friend. Boner science.
Things were easy when he was just a penis. Now he's a penis with feelings.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You made a course evaluation for your vagina? Wow. You really are a professor now.
I tried getting kicked out of my favorite bar. No matter what I did, I could do no wrong
But I did discover that he's totally okay with going down on me while I eat taco bell so that's a plus, right?
I turned on Elf, made myself a mojito, and am eating one of a sleeve of Ritz. You tell me if I wanna go out tonight.
Why did I wake up covered in glitter next to a half eaten cheeseburger?
Just stalked the girl I hooked up with last night's boyfriend. He seems nice, I approve.
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