I went out, and slept with my sunglasses on
YOu come back ASAP and we will do whatever you want baby
Just saw my gyno in public. Weird to see her hands outside of my vagina.
but, i was nude. you really should respect my stupidity and delete them. please.
Just had sex with a girl from Italy. The only english she knew was Obama campaign slogans. Her screaming, "Yes we can!" as I was railing her not only turned me on but allowed my neighbors to know it was consentual.
He corrected me on my grammar when I came. Fuck English majors.
So, how do I go about conveying: I'm sorry, yet very glad she is having my abortion. Via text msg?
Dude, you need to understand there is a fine line between "guilty pleasure" and in the closet gay
How dare you. Idk what you called me, and neither does google translate, but you better take it back.
Is it acceptable to have my intern get me pedialite and plan b?
It's a learning experience. She can add to her resume that she cured her bosses hangover and poor decisions
right now I need to figure out a smart way to get an accurate picture of his dick so I know what in dealing with, right now in flying blind.
i don't know what body building stuff he's on, but his cum is basically a 5 hour energy shot.
if anyone knows where my shirt is please let me know and if you know why I don't have my own shirt please also let me know. also do any of you know why I'm missing a bra wire?
i took a magical journey through the park for about two hours. it was amazing and everything was fantastical. i have been informed someone babysat me through that shit.
I'm debating a nap but also debating breaking into the liquor cabinet
Randomize
