I hate my date so much right now for even thinking I want to do the electric slide.
took 5 apple pie shots. caution: flames. not digestable.
What the hell do I have to do to get some foreplay around here? This sucks.
I think you know the answer.
How can I marinade myself in Vodka?
I just saw a guy in the gym riding the bicycle while watching baseball and dipping.
according to the contents of this bucket, last night i swallowed a whole teabag
Btw, I'm creating an event on fb to celebrate the one yr anniversary since we went to jail.
After giving a back rub to someone in the bathroom of the theater, he ripped an "employees must wash hands" sign off the wall to prove that he could and proceeded to hang it up in his house.
todays sighting is titled: Bum taking pictures with an invisible camera.
I can dream in two languages, but it's still about ripping a bong.
Getting high in the car with mom and the aunts during intermission for drag queen bingo. Details later.
I'm just wondering how Jon managed to get vomit ON THE CEILING?
Dog. I woke up between my ex boyfriend witch i'm currently fucking and his bestfriend spooning me in MY bestfriends empty powerless house still really fucked up. No one knows what happend.
you asked me how to turn on the ladder
you came home and ate 12 bananas. you really didnt think mom would know you were high?
God yes pancakes and booze sounds like the best night ever.
Randomize
