How is it? Sketchville?
cheap drinks and peanuts cancel out any form of sketchiness
So I've only had a mustache for about 5 minutes and I'm already pretty sure it's the best decision I've ever made.
they ran out of ice so they are using frozen shrimp in their drinks
Woke up in a kilt. And it's not my kilt. Drinking was a success.
I have no idea what to do about this. He has a power over me and I think its called his tongue.
I tried to tell her I've only slept with 3 other people...she then named off 5 of her sorority sisters I fucked and asked me if she should continue
do you think they make 'sorry for walking in on you drunkenly jacking of to a picture of me' cards?
Dude, it could be so much worse. That Dale kid lost a toe I think.
we broke up because he couldn't handle the fact that i've slept with more girls than he has. also, i've slept with the girl he's seeing now.
your body is your temple. do you really want a bunch of dicks in your temple?
Ok: all ex-gfs except you from the last 5 years have or are about to have a baby...be on the lookout...
Ok. I'm gonna smoke some weed and look at some elephants without you then.
At least you didn't wake up next to your professor who then proceeded to cancel class via phone while still inside of me.
Dude in the stall next to me shitting and sobbing. Dude another stall over, "Come on bro, you gotta loosen up." This is why I don't shit in public.
Anyway, that's been my evening- crying and looking up diabetes symptoms. How was your night?
Randomize