I tried karate at age 7 and quit after realizing it conflicted with watching new episodes of "Full House."
i might have gotten away with it if "don't tase me bro!" wasn't the first thing i said when i rolled down my window.
So there's 10 guys in this picture..I've made out with 5 of them. does this make me a slut?
eh 50% isn't bad..i'd say 80% is slut material.
The stripper on stage Is eating a mozzarella stick while on the pole....that's a new level of I don't give a fuck
Just did my hair and make up at mcdonalds so we're in the same boat.
im celebrating the fact lent is over and i can give blow jobs again.
When I eventually hook up with a resident lets refer to it as taking a hands on approach to my job
I want to own their dicks and all the attachments
I like to get drunk just like anyone else but not to the point of sticking a rubber tube up my asshole
Yea no bueno and I only brought enough weed to last one night. And it was no Hanukah nug, it didn't last 8 days.
I can't wash the smell of tacos off my hands. I feel like the Lady Macbeth of Chipotle.
He's like a Lana del Rey song that took human form
You threw up a gallon of vomit. I really have never seen anything like it in my decade of partying.
Appearently I went across the hall last night demanding to ride my neighbors moose... How much did I drink?
He had a vasectomy. I think I'm in love.
Randomize
