she is unbelievable! ever pee on a girl?
not while she was awake
thus making me awesome and them whores
Note to all middle aged "I totally let myself go after childbirth" frumpy mothers: I do not dress this way for your husbands. Stop looking at me like that. It's not my fault.
I cant wait for your democrat phase to be over.
i dont understand why you dont get why i love him. i opened the bathroom door and he had his penis in his right hand and a mcdouble in his left.
What I wanna know is who took a picture eiffel towering her?
It's nice to see a girl prepared for the walk of shame. She brought headphones
no i brought the cat to the bar. I got a weird look when I walked in but now everyone loves her.
He whinnies like a horse when he's cumming. I wish I would have known this before we got into a relationship.
She started howling at the moon. That was pretty much the deal breaker.
Whenever we go out my brain flips on autopilot, straight to blackout.
Know what was probably a bad idea? Using white wine as a mixer for vodka.
I'm gonna play eenie meenie at the bar tonight because it's women's day and I deserve the dick
all i remember is arguing with the chick that yahoo was better than google
all you were doing was yelling YAHOOOOO in her face
so i won
I love you.
Bad choice
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