Just watched 1 guy 1 jar with my mom. Awkwardville...
I love the moment a guy admits defeat against the front clasping bra.
This creepy guy was following me and i hid in the bushes. i could say i was high as an excuse but honestly it was straight up fun.
So not only did you shoot down my invitation and prob walked past my house but now ur excluding me from a wet t shirt contest which btw i totally would have won
I'm not proud of how I threatened that 8 year old during drunken laser tag
I didn't cheat on him. He just hasn't been informed of the open part of our relationship.
I need a Jamo leash. Just tie it to my wrist and every time you see me reaching for a shot of it, just yank my hand away
First you say "it can't get any worse" and the next thing you know you've shat yourself on Christmas Eve.
Who wrote "the chamber of secrets has been open, enemies of the heir beware" across my bathroom wall?
I dressed up as a "typical white girl" which meant I wore my yoga pants and uggs all night. BEST. IDEA. EVER. Most comfy halloween everrrr.
Thank you for helping a fellow gay friend today. You are sublime and deserve free tickets to the Ellen show
That cat I follow on Facebook beat cancer so we're drinking tonight in celebration
I had the good sense not to tell her that my summer goal is to get fucked by a med student while wearing a party dress and sparkly shoes
Slept on the bathroom floor again. I hope when I turn 28 I’ll stop doing that
He was gone when I woke up. But he left skid marks on my sheets and our unopened bottle of Titos is missing
New Rule: No more sleepovers with guys we met on Reddit
Randomize
