He is fucking rediculously sexy. DO HIM NOW. NOW. NOW. NOW.
singing on the bus should be illegal
huh?
There's a group of like 8 white people in the back of the bus harmonizing to sugar we're going down
New years is officially the only time its okay to drunk dial your parents.
Dude I pulled down his pants and he already had a condom on
then you put baby powder on the bottom of your feet and walked to your room so "ladies would follow the footprints"
she had that "i just got used" look on her face when i kicked her out at 5am
I made out with all three roommates...I didnt realize that was actually an awkward situation.
This is irresponsible on your part, leaving me alone in a bar.
If we order a pizza and I contribute 9 cents, is that fair?
Back. Waiting on Thong the shuttle bus driver. THONG
That moment when the line ‘If you want a hot body you better work bitch’ in Britney Spears’ new song comes on as you’re using two forks to shovel enchilada into your mouth.
His dick is magical but I don't want to die in this blizzard do you see my dilemma
You offered the police officer a Snickers ice cream bar and cried when he wouldn't take it...
I feel like I'm in high school again. I'm completely sober and I just gave some guy a handjob to completion.
She deleted me on Facebook. I think it's safe to say that she knows I fucked him now.
Randomize
