um. i met him on myspace...we text now, he lives down the street
idk if its the weather or the "im still drunk" or the morning sex i just had with my roommates gf but that was def the most enjoyable walk in the rain ever
cheating on your boyfriend is the best diet ever, I've barely eaten in days. The guilt is killing me
Everyone makes mistakes, yours just means you will forever be known as the chick that tried to steal a cheese plate from the funeral.
I'm just concerned it's gonna end up in my vagina again
Dude. I have so much pot that i only worry about running out of lighters
I want to get my vag crammed with complete loss of every bit of dignity I have left by this man from every angle on every flat surface that exists. That is all.
I feel like this has turned into my work. But if I get paid sitting under a desk, that's perfectly fine with me.
She is currently drunk and caressing my professor's face with one hand.
I'm worried because he hasn't removed it.
Yeah you were fine except for when you peed under the bar
Once upon a time I threw up in my own hands last night.
i'm in a very strange mood rn i'm listening to bruno mars??? am i ok????
I’m doing some soul searching to figure out how much of a slut I’m going to be the rest of the summer.
I can always count on you to keep my boobs honest
How high are you rn
Well I just ate a cheesecake straight from the box with a fork and now I’m laying upside down in a recliner chair seeing if I can Uber eats Doritos
So not that high
Randomize
