Yeah i wasn't gonna go out but then i was like im not gonna get my dick wet stayin at home studying
just used a caramelizing gun to spark a bowl, i don't think today could get much better than this.
i'm going through the NYU 2014 group looking for future drunken hookups. too slutty?
You kept telling that ginger girl, "it's not your fault, it's not your fault, it's not your fault."
You are two creepy Justin Bieber quotes away from me not talking to you for the rest of the day
If I had a pelvic thrust emoticon, I would use it
Too bad my thesis topic isn't "defining a hot mess: a study in drinking, smoking and other bad life decisions."
Can you explain to me why I woke up with my hands tied to the hotel bed with the phone cord???
Not sure if he was actually hot or hot in a "he brought a live chicken to the party" kinda way but I got his # regardless
she's like a sexy human version of my cat. i can't catch her, and she keeps throwing up in the corners.
It took me half an hour to realize I didnt know them
third nipple confirmed
Don't remember our skype call last night too well, but did I pee while skyping you?
Woke up with champagne in my hair and honey mustard on my hands. Strangely, I'm okau with this
i'm trying not to stalk him on facebook
i gave in
Nothing says “I spent too much in Vegas” quite like eating a jar of pickles for dinner and planning on cream of celery soup for breakfast tomorrow.
Randomize
