im gay
i know
yea but for you.
The little things make me happy. Little dicks do not.
Fucking freshmen need to learn how to puke in the bushes outside the dorm and not in the fucking elevator.
Well I woke up with spatula marks on my ass and burns on my hands.
sick fucks of a feather flock together
You should have hard cock pics on hand to send in the situation that you can't stop driving, pull out your cock, browse the countless pics I've sent you of my tits, get him hard and text a pic through. I mean, it's simple sexting ettiquette.
I sent two dick pics to a wrong number and one was in .gif format so it was helicoptering all over the place. I single handedly ruined a child's life.
Whenever I'm not in the mood and don't want to go to bed swampy, I just strategically suck him off during the second period intermission of the Cup playoffs and he leaves me alone and does the dishes. It's a win-win.
I walk in and my mom has a Christian workout program playing. It's like, gospel music with an "electronic" beat to go with it. And then they try to save your soul at the end. I hate being home.
did i make more ranch sandwiches last night
you had 4
We literally solved our fight using cat pictures on Instagram. True love.
We can't go out this weekend. My uterus is so desperate it's given me permanent beer goggles
Matched with the lumberjack. Here's your wedding invite.
Her tits are so fantastic they gave him a panic attack.
he offered to let me fuck his brother , of course im marrying him
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