the crunchwrap supreme is the def leppard of the taco bell menu
which is why it's clearly superior
Things he has used as lube on me: olive oil, cologne, purell, spit, tanning oil, and bottled hotel lotion
He needs to save up for some actual ky before my vagina gets an allergic reaction
The sign in front of ihop says "designated drivers get half off their order"
I'm lonelier than Tom Hanks in Cast Away, right meow. Ready to make this bong my Wilson.
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She screamed at us, "You guys need to wake up and smell the beer-bong!"
I think it really helped to be hungover at accepted students day. it gave me a good feel for how it would be everyday if I go there.
i've written a new chapter in the saga of unexpected dongs
I love you, but it's "shark week" I'll make it up to you with naked breakfast.
I'm not allowed to have sex with him again. My vagina joined in on the protest. There was a petition. All my body parts signed it.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My guy issues hinge on tonight's game. Caps win, it's Dustin. Rangers win, Josh. I even flipped a coin to see who got what team
I'm not trying to take your husband away from you, but can we have another 3way soon? I'm just desperate for good dick.
He put his SoundCloud on his Tinder bio. I felt personally attacked.
To be clear you just said "I'll give you a baby" as a sext?
She bruised my penis again. But, trooper I am we kept on going.
Sean just lit a cig with his taser..... I am in awe
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