How can i ever say i miss u when u wont go away
This cookie i'm eating tastes like pizza. It was so worth contacting my sister for pot.
I would go down on you faster than GM stock
no, I didn't make it. Instead, i watched VH1 for... 13 hours? I use the question mark because I was using Flavor Flav's clocks to tell time after the first 3 hours.
I'm a fake celebrity on twitter. I need a life.
You know how i spent all of black friday on the plane? Well guess who's getting a x-mas gift from skymall?!!??
I'm watching this guy on intervention hospitalized for liver damage. He's drinking the hand sanitizer in the hospital room. Say hello to your future.
His fuck buddy just got fake tits and wants him to 'come break them in.' I need his life.
literally hosing herself off in my back yard with the hose. i offered her the shower but she refused. that drunk.
Ya I guess if we compared our actions now with our actions 2 years ago. We are definitely in a constant state of shit showness.
I filled this oven with as much Pizza as I could, and I've been eating out of it for three days.
Just ate the last piece. Refilling the oven.
Are u guys proud? I puked my brains out last night at a strip club. While my two fave strippèrs held my hair
If you enjoy dance recitals as much as I do, that's one shitty Father's Day...
I can appreciate that you picked up the hot drummer, but don’t have sex in front of my house lmao
Gameplan: If the cops show up, find a potted plant to hide behind... It's worked before!
Randomize
