Writing my paper on freud at bar
??
Going up to girls and asking if they were anal explosive or anal retentive as children
Smooth
there should be a rule against ugly people hooking up.
yeah...but then what would the ugly people do? hook up with pretty people? yeahhh..don't see that happening in the near future. plus i'm not okay with that.
Just saw the liqour store owner get into a mercedes, almost proud to be responsible for that
i convinced her i was a yoga teacher by showing her some warm-ups my high school track coach made up
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He violated my cat. I was not impressed.
its my first week of college and i have a UTI
not easy being a whore now is it
Was there a Canadian at your party or did I dream that?
Are you aware that you called me "Sexy clit lady" last night?
then he grabbed my tit and yelled "FOR NARNIA!!" then dove into my vag. i think I will do him again strictly for the entertainment value
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He threw up on my head while I was blowing him, and then I started barfing, and the kitchen floor was a mess. Believe me, he will never, ever live this down.
it's the international house of making me almost fucking shit myself
The man built me a fort. Of course he got laid.
I just feel weird about accepting their wedding invite when I've got a post-engagement video on my phone of him jacking off in my bathroom.
Ahhh the shame of taking out my recycling
You turned down sex for fried cheese??
My penis and doctor won't be happy with me, but come on. Fried cheese!
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