using my metrocard to split lines. it says optimism on the back. i am optimistic that you will appear at my door and help me finish all these drugs.
I'm in the dining hall. that same guy is here again, the one who sits alone and talks to his silverware.
I'm going to come in a little later this morning....there's no heterosexual way to say this....$1 flip flop sale at old navy
So... Sorry I threw that watermelon at you the other day. I didn't think it would break any bones.
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I'd hate to be 100% hetero. Pretty sure they have less orgies
She waited 7 months to break out her comicon costumes. I was only mad it took her so long. I fucked an elf last night and strawberry shortcake the night before!
If we had kids we couldn't come home, get high and watch porn together. And that's like the only reason I get up in the morning
I also woke up on my floor. Naked. On a pile of clothes. With my head in the trash can. And a sheet over me.
I'll call it a tollerance break and either will be celebrating my new job with a bowl or will be smoking my sadness away from not getting the job. Either way.
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I keep getting the feeling him and his friends are hilarious and we should drink whiskey together forever
The fact that I am laying in bed on my stomach with an ice pack on my rump is a clear indication that I am no longer in my carefree 20s
He got in a fight. Then called me drunk to see if he should bail his friends out, or walk through a Taco Bell drive-thru. True love.
He's my ex's boss. I'm not above sleeping with him for that fact alone.
Actually we have similar relationship styles aka no relationship... it could work
its like probably shouldnt be sending pics of your asshole to strangers who work in the same building as you
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