have fun at tinkers! p.s. are there any hot guys who look like they wanna wait until marriage to have sex?
Which one of you FUCKERS filled the toilet with soil and planted my mothers daisys in it? NOT FUCKING HAPPY
You called me twice to tell me that you spit in your own eye, when I was right next to you.
she texted him the burrito order while she was puking in the Del Taco parking lot...
I just shot gunned a beer for your birthday alone because you're too hungover at midnight to get out of bed. I'm not sure which of us is the bigger loser
Besides, I'm not in my 30's. I'm still allowed to drink wine from a bag.
I'd like to personally thank you for not letting anyone puke in any of the salad bowls this time
If i pass out for a while at graduation, please atleast TRY to wake me?
I'll explain later but basically I was feeling dangerous, I'm dressed as Ann Romney and Ann Romney is a bad bitch.
Whoa, I am aware of WAY too many squirrels right now...
I'll text you later. I think she thinks we're taking this whole "no sex" thing seriously.
I'm sorry but the visual image of you suffocating on vagina is basically hysterical
Pretty sure the guy I hooked up with Saturday gave me a buy one get one free coupon for chipotle. Who said nice guys don't exist?
Had to admit my broken elbow was caused by vodka, not hockey
Are we planning this because I am online looking for places with a Mechanical bull
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