Got separated, got a half bj, got dropped off in random part of the city, don't tell anyone
headbutted the bartender, tried to bite the bouncer, and pissed on a cops shoes. and i still got laid. god, it's good to be home
I had fun this weekend too. According to Web MD, my symptoms say I had a miscarriage.
The Swedes wanted a tensome.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Ok... I'm a little jealous... Grab her pig tails and ride her like a jet ski. Making motor noises is optional.
Just found a bag of weed nailed to the door that my dealer dropped off since I wasn't home. God I love Boulder.
When i say that im working late and also have a paper to write before 9am tomorrow all i want u to respond is saying that ur gunna come over and sexually distract me from my responsibilities. Not a fucking frowny face.
Sorry. Im on my way.
Druken naked yoga : jus another ploy to keep your husbands eye in check
Just know I'm having fun but I still have my motor functions.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
it took us a while to figure out sex on a tire swing, buuuuuuuut MISSION ACCOMPLISHED
Do you rver get that feeling like their are poprocks filling ur boday?
You have no idea the kind of bodily contortions I had to do to access your neighbor's WIFI
Well I smoked some weird shit and I think I peed on my phone.
I was out of breath when we were getting started and he offered me his inhaler so he's a keeper
My boss and I ended up at the same strip club. We both got lap dances while talking about work.
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