I just decorated my birth control case with Lisa Frank stickers. If that doesn't scream 'I'm not ready for babies' I don't know what does.
he seriously made his penis a facebook.
You mailed him a break up letter, because you thought the "joy of receiving a letter" would ease the pain of you dumping him.
Have you ever tried running while drinking 151?
they night at the roxbarryed us. came out of nowhere,bought us shots, and then the big one licked my hand? we got out of that noise.
I must have drunkenly masturbated really loud last night, cause my roommate and his wife wont look at me
She told me she was eating frosting, then I got the weirdest boner ever
i’m not very adjusted to having free time. for example, I forgot how much fun it is to masturbate.
Ya know what's been the best part of this College Football Season? Not having to hear Brent Musberger say the Honey Badger 77 fucking times.
I'm almost positive that you shat in a birdhouse
how many ponies have to be on my pajama pants to convince him im gay?
i think we need a new approach.
Did I run into a tree or get punched in the face?
Both.
She looks like a Midwestern news anchor that got fired so she has done nothing but eat for the past 6 months.
Flacco has been sacked like 7 times. His name also auto corrects to Flaccid. That's so sad
TJ is going to paint me in a Patriots Jersey he can paint you in an eagle jersey. Did this last year and got so much dick.
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