She's hot and she went to Notre Dame. I want to fuck the Catholic right out of her
at first I thought it was funny, but looking at it now, it screams "dramatic" and "medicated wipes."
i lnow ive slrrwsdy teted you this. but goddamn girl on tv is a good song
i talked to you about this last night, and you kept saying "he wants yo pusssaayyyyyy"
i'm just sitting here going through her tagged pics, covering up different parts of her face to try and figure out exactly what it is that makes her so ugly.
You told me you loved me after I brushed your teeth with my index finger.
You refused to get in the cab so we rock paper scissored to decide who walked you home and the fat guy was it. So don't blame your poor hook-up choice on me; it was all you.
Just got 20% off at the liquor store. How you ask? I asked if there was an "I got divorced today" discount.
Are you still feeling it? I'm in the bathtub. The water doesn't work but it's okay because I'm wearing pants.
hey if you're going to the hospital do you wanna pick me up a taco on your way back
I wish they would just make alcoholic protein shakes already.
Girl, we were harassing people from the top of a building. I don't know how I got down, but I'm eating chocolate cake in my kitchen. Sall good yo.
i feel like ive seen the light, but not in the nasty christian way. thats gross. say no to jesus, kids
good morning. i just did a walk of shame in front of his grandmother.
If you wanna do actual business call my office. If you’re just looking to get laid you need to up your game
Randomize
