I'm so over stopping myself from talking about my sexual experiences in front of children.
just watched her puke in her purse and put it back on the bar. then half hour later put her hand in her bag to get a pen to give me her number. I bet she is game for anything
Waiting outside the STD clinic 30 min before it opens already in a line up. It's like were all waiting for a concert that no ones really pumped for
I'm okay.. I had a good heart to heart with the cab driver Raheem - it's going to be our year.
If a Romanian girl's marriage isn't considered legal in the US then she's fair game right?
i get the sense she is planing new and exciting ways to physically harm me during sex
I feel like we shud celebrate your sisters homecoming by having sex in her room
Though I feel a moral obligation to take you there, point out all of the male supervisors and slap you on the wrist and yell, "NO!!"
Thinking of someone think of me while masturbating while I masturbate. & that's how the over thinkers do it ✌️
Take the weirdness of Japan and add the insanity of Florida and that's Jimmy
So i came so hard i almost passed out, where has this vibrator been all my life?
Well I typed "penicillin a" into the search engine and before I could finish "penicillin and drinking" popped up. Google knows me too well.
How do you explain to your mom that you let your friend stab you in the leg while drunk and high on coke?
The only thing that makes a night with half a bottle of cheap vodka is the other half of that bottle of cheap vodka.
My debit card was between my ass cheeks when i woke up. i vaguely remember putting it there for safe keeping
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