he just sent me a friend request on facebook. i wish it were physically possible to vomit on him through the internet.
He made sure to throw up on the Mexico side of the border while we were in line at the check point. Then finished by screaming you an have it back. You can have it all back.
dude, I just walked in on your little brother changing clothes...I'm ashamed to say I noticed, but that kid has as MASSIVE cock...
Yeah...we all know. it's the elephant in the room at family gatherings.
that is a frighteningly accurate metaphor for it.
All four of us managed to throw up in the same bathroom at different times during the night. I think we'll get along great living together.
sometimes i wish i was a boob, they get to chill in soft and cuddly little cup things.
if your not going to answer your phone this is just going to be an embarrassment tomorrow
So Monday we're lesbians.
Deal. This decision is final and any rebates on this will result in losing an eyeball.
He doesn't care. He wouldn't care if my vag grew arms and smacked him in the face.
I want to lick his teeth again. Is that a creepy thing to say?
He let me keep my Michael Jordan Bulls jersey on during sex.
Technically ya I did. Hes tried to get down my pants like 3 times now and every time I have been all "these are not the Droids you are looking for"
Do not tell guys at bars about kittens you rescue. They will walk away.
I didn't know I was invited to an orgy.
Parade of Dicks...that's what I'm calling 2017
He may be a manwhore, but he’s a very well endowed manwhore
That’s an important feature when it comes to a manwhore
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