so the chest pain/shortness of breath/overdose guy we just took to tm hospital is now running down market street from the police in a gown holding his iv.
i love marijuana more then i could love a human baby.
My vag should have a twitter account. It would be like "destroyed another condom today".
There is an old man sitting across from me. Phone rang and his ringtone is children giggling, I'm not safe here.
Mental note: adding peach schnapps to a gin and tonic does not "water it down."
we were totes just talking about. huu in the bathbub. 5 girlszzz
I just reached for my seatbelt when I sat down to pee... Might be a little hungover.
What are you talking about?! I shot gunned a monster while simaltaneously blowing gym boy Todd. If I'm not the poster child for being well rounded and versatile I have no idea what NYU is looking for
Sorry I can't go bowling with you guys. I'm getting daytime dick. That's the best kind.
Please stop letting me make out with hot lesbians.
Definitely not. I may be your best friend, but first and foremost I am a guy. Please continue.
We can Fuck in the shower to save time
And this is why I like you. You're so damn innovative.
Well I think I made it pretty obvious I wasn't in to it. I was drinking a beer while he was going down in me
Do you ever actually plan things? Or is it always drugs then whatever happens? I'm considering being worried about you
Prop 8 repealed and I FINALLY got my period. Good day for America!!!
That dick was not the dick of a twenty year old
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