yeah he was eating me out and i didnt know someone made popcorn so I thought the smell was comming from my vagina
wtf
Succesfully slept on the roof at work for 3.5 hours without getting caught. I need a promotion
I cant feel my face. Like I dont even know if I have one. I wish I had a helmet
I'm smoking a bowl and pondering why we haven't discovered teleportation again.
Like 50% of me thinks it'll be weird, 25% of me is curious & 25% of me is horny
...I think I just watched a boy make a sandwich seductively. What.
The last thing I remember is goading each other into a vodka-chugging competition.
I don't think my professor is going to remember the Halloween party... or the fact that he made out with a priest.
ok so i took my anxiety medication and i'm eating junior mints and i think my vagina will be ok
I'm gonna celebrate Valentines day by watching Bob Ross videos and tripping balls.
You literally chaperoned my booty call.
Also, full disclose I puked in a fruit barrel box
You lost me at unexpected butt stuff. Everything else I would probably do.
we played his NES Classic. Turns out there is a warp zone to my vagina.
But seriously like how many girls do you know that will do that on the first date?
One?
ONE! And it was was glorious!
Randomize
