and everytime i fart i feel like in your heart, you can hear it
Spaghetti and Car Bombs, good idea or what will end up on the bar in a few minutes?
grad school is all the worst parts of undergrad, without the binge drinking and bad decisions to make up for it
Just got a lecture from Dad about how I need to be more responsible and start buying my weed in larger quantities so that i can save money. Like he was serious and kind of disappointed in me for not adapting to his method earlier.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
When are you comin back?
probably mid next week, depending on when i finish my remaining half gallons
Just remember that she is a giant dick-sucking forehead and you are better than that.
Found our threesome girl. She says I'm pretty. She doesn't know I'm pregnant. Yet. Think we can pull it off?
How drunk is she?
She's trying to French braid the dogs hair, there's no stopping her
I just got stoned alone and repierced my nose. don't ever tell me I'm unaccomplished
I just got stoned by myself and am eating cookies so I'm right there with you
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The struggle bus crashed, rolled down a mountain, and went on fire, and I was on it ugh.
The highlight was when a stranger was nose to nose with you threatening to kick ur ass, and you said "Is that your real face? Stopped him dead.
Come on, will you just fuck him so we can watch Star Wars.
Just let me suck your dick and be happy. Let me have this.
I think you threw up on me last night but i can't remember so i'm not mad at you.
Well now I’m in the bathroom puking up absinthe so guess I beat myself up over it one way or the other
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