Your girlfriend is a south jersey whore
I gave my ex the dutch oven last night. How was your night?
There is a such thing as a wonderpuss octopus. Officially my new favorite animal.
i love how cold weather makes identifying sluts easier. is it below freezing? is she wearing a tube top? she's easy.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She set fire to my carpet trying to power-dry puke covered cigs with Josh's blowtorch. How she found it in the garage is beyond me but if you bring her with you again I'll shoot you myself.
U know that drunk state, where at 930 the next morning your sitting in a bath in ur bathing suit trying to sober up...yeah. That's where i am..
you're right. i am beautiful. like a May day. frolicking in a meadow of wildflowers. platinum in one hand. pipe in the other. that kind of beautiful.
$150 and 3 orgasms. Dogsitting is awesome.
He got naked after doing the Ice Water Challenge and it was still enormous. So, yeah, I stayed over.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Ya know, one would think a restraining order would keep me from fucking my ex.
You are ridiculously similar to a unicorn, and I want to fuck that unicorn.
Let's just say when I woke up I was still drunk. My hangover hit me around noon so I chilled w my dad and took a bath and shower at the same time. You just can't do that at college
Yea.. And you'll love me a whole lot more when I start letting my vagina make all the decisions..
We already gave up cheese, how are we supposed to give up coke?
Who’s got two thumbs and just got laid in the administration building?
Randomize