Christians are straight up FREAKS
i learned of a new sex move called the pterodactyl. 3 guys stand in a row. 1 girl blows the one in the middle while jerking off the other two. kids these days!
Yaeh! Back in our day we had to wait our turn for some party whore to blow us!
well there you go. the average partycunt evolved into megapartycunt just like scientists predicted.
How did your new apartment party go last night?
I'm really happy i have a bigger bathroom to puke in.
He offered but I said no. I didn't think it'd be cool to accept cupcakes in the mens room of a gentlemans club.
ok, just found out the kid i had random sex with in April was on wheel of fortune so i can really no longer say i regret that night
I don't think anyone could emotionally handle a numb vagina.
It's only 11:30 and she's already making friends with the homeless...
Had dinner with my ex husband. The box of wine is gone and I'm laying on the floor in my wedding dress. Where are you?!
NoShamevember. You game?
BTW he text me to text him later after the concert to hang out. Im prepping my bed but I should know I shouldn't count my dicks before they hatch
Being the hot sister definately has advantages, I'm pretty sure I ruined her engagement
GO RIDE HIS EYEBROWS INTO THE SUNSET
TFW YOU ACCIDENTALLY SEND A MEME ABOUT LIKING ANAL TO THE GROUP CHAT. JESUS FUCKING CHRIST, WHAT IS WRONG WITH ME?
I can still taste your cum in my mouth and my in-laws are coming over. This should go well.
I need to start dating older women. We tried sexting and she used more emojis than actual words. It was so bad that I did the math...her messages were 54% emoji. No one should make me feel this old when I'm only 28.
Randomize