PS- did you die? If you did just text "dead" to me, so that I know.
Dude, the women on the view have some valid arguments
You know how I know you're gay?
The best part was that when I woke up, I poked her with my dick to wake her up, and said, "Hi, I'm Alex. Nice to meet you". Shoulda seen the look on her face. Priceless.
Next guy we share better have a little more dignity than that
security doesn't like it when we pee on cars. or maybe just not theirs?
Watched a women out our tannin salon literally fight police because she was getting arrested for trying to drunkenly fight the tanning salon owner...we need to step up our day drinking this is shameful.
Your wedding's just one more day in my life I can't wear sweat pants.
Bring enough bail money and little extra for tacos after
The strip clubs here are like a safari of penis, and I'm gonna bag me a rhino.
I feel like someone poured gasoline and bleach in my nose and lit it on fire.
Why! I don't feel that at all!!!! I feel jipped
So Bodhi just sent me a pic of someone's balls with a message that says "I hope you all have a ballin' night." I don't even know what level of friendship to call this anymore.
Oh my god.
The ballsiest level.
Hes done the math! Hes calculated how much sex it's going to take to fuck 365 miles. Now thats a little brother im proud of. New resolutions are a go!
I figured if he was OK cheating on his gf with a guy, he'd be OK with me posting his number to m4m Craigslist Ads
I'm going to need a penis the size of a bat
we're forecasting high levels of inebriation into the evening with dropping temperatures late at night
Randomize
