Plan A DEFINITELY worked... Go with me to get Plan B??
either my laughing turned him on, or he wanted to shut me up. either way, i dont care. it was amazing.
after I pulled back my foreskin she said, "cool like a transformer". I really like her now.
I have no idea where we are. But it doesn't look dirty so I don't think we are in jersey yet
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Woke up with string cheese braided into my hair- literally braided
we decided it was best to cut you off after we caught you trying to "baptize" my cat in the jungle juice
He's cheating on his wife, and he's judging me for eating McDonalds
I gave an inspirational speech to a bum and called a bride ugly at her wedding reception.
You're about to fuck a guy with a sweatshirt tied around his waist like a mensurating 13 year old. Get your priorities straight, you're graduating tomorrow.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You're the third person who's asked me for an afternoon blow connection in one day. Unreal.
That's more of a you-issue than a me-issue
I love spring semester, so many high school girls visiting that think I'm the sexiest man alive just because I'm in college
Aren't you gay?
IT'S NICE TO FEEL WANTED DON'T RUIN THIS FOR ME
My balls are resting on a block of frozen cheese in a sealed bag
Some small part of me hopes I'm on the probationary list because of seeing the Dean at that fetish party.
I woke up naked with a Jason mask on and a fat lip. What happened last night?
I just walked across town, stoned off my ass and barefoot in 35 degree weather for him to bust five mins in and then apologize 13 times as I got dressed.
Randomize