I want the hot one, scratch that. anyone.
Yay Minnesota! I can't believe there's now a US Senator who has taken more acid than we have
are you going to last longer than 15 seconds
nope
are you sure you're not interested? he's the dunkin donuts employee of the month.
He passed out so we kept throwing water on him, he got excited and asked if we were at the wave pool.
i got iced as i was inside of her. i fucking hate my friends
Sorry for drunk singing "love hurts" to you at 3 am.
He called my vagina a rainforest. This is coming from a guy whose pubes are longer than his dick.
at what point last night did i decided to have a photo shoot with your camel toe
I drink more single than I do in relationships. Except with assface.
Finally washing the shoe scuff marks off my front windshield :( bye bye memories
Not my man #1 and if he likes it then he should put a title on it. Till then the gates of hell. Aka my vagina are open for entrance.
Our group of friends now have more broken bones than reasonable excuses for why they're broken.
17. The number of times my one night stand told me he loved me.
ive decided that just saying "yes" when people assume I am something other than Caucasian will highly benefit my love life. last night I was native.
Randomize
