how much do you want to bet that her wedding invites will be vera bradley themed? loser has to frame theirs.
It's an open bar on a yacht... I'm going to drown.
We ran out of ice cubes so I used ice cream. Everyone thought that was the plan all along. I just went with it.
Half of elefante. Gelafin galaxy
i love all of you. Physical. Emotional. Mental. All of it. When we speak i feel like a feather or a dragon depending on the conversation ...
We used a lit joint as a candle for her birthday cake
Definitely need to find a less healthy bootycalls. All this bitch got in her fridge is feta, English muffins and wheat grass. What the fuck can I make with that???
Found 2 Coors, problem solved.
I was drunk petting a fox and taking shots of Jager. That's about as outdoorsy as it gets.
I'm also sorry that I ate your chicken sandwich while you were throwing up....
So is that the only criterion for shenanigans now? Don't die?
I caught myself caressing my own hand while nurturing a glass of bourbon. I think it's time to get back out there.
I was told i took a shot doing a headstand in the backseat then proceeded to barf all over my face
I had no idea you were so talented.
He corrected my spelling during sexting.
You made me brush your teeth last night......for 47 minutes.
just found a joint on the street in downtown. smoked it with the hot guy from my chem class
WHAT IS UP WITH YOU SMOKING/ DRINKING THINGS OFF THE GROUND?
Randomize
