Who goes to Church hungover
Those who weren't lucky enough to go still drunk
bowling with tennis balls and shot glasses. whatever you dont knock down after 2 rolls, you drink.
she went to type in rate my professors and rate my pussy came up in my recent searches. needless to say, i will likely be masturbating to the aforementioned site tonight.
I am so getting Plan B when we get home. Not getting knocked up by a dude with a hair piece.
There's guys at my school running around throwing potatoes shouting "remember the famine." makes me proud to be Irish.
You can come over, sure. But I'll be watching college hockey during the blow job.
Amazing how you can get from "Merry Christmas" to sex in three texts.
I could have done it in 2
Sometimes crazy just comes naturally. I don't need booze to say that on occasion I feel the need to rip off my asshole and throw it against the fridge to see if it sticks.
In the wise words of Scar: "be prepared."
Do you think Scar was a Boy Scout?
We're over by the bouncy castles. I'm the one wearing a baby. Bring Twizzlers.
First poop in my apartment for the summer, officially settled in. :)
Was I drunk or did Alex not show up with 100 rainbow Jell-O shots?
we had to invent a new word for how drunk I was last night
Sitting on my couch watching TV in my underwear drinking a bottle of wine.... and you want to interrupt me to come pick you up. No I will not do it.
I'm with jana at walgreens picking out penis rings.... Did you know they sell vibrators at walgreens? Wtf?
Randomize
