I hope my future cuntsucker is that tight
It doesn't matter if they shave you or not, you're still susceptible to the staph infection.
He'd bedazzaled his ass. Im not even that gay...
Im going home to examine my vagina with a hand mirror. wish me luck.
No... No really he actually thought the condom was meant for his hand...
studying for my Anatomy final and masturbating to Japanese porn are practically the same thing
Don't mind the bowl full of ashes in the sink. I meant to set that on fire.
I just don't do feelings in the summer months.
Someone had Captain Morgan and orange juice at the same moment I lost my hangover and I just had to give it a try.
He literally wrote out a schedule. On it, there's a taco break, and a spot where I start crying.
You know, I think when I have a lot of free time, thats when I pick up odd lovers. Maybe keeping busy is key to not using my vagina
My ex's new gf is pregnant and he is sterile, so 2016 is starting off well.
Dude I asked him to get me beef jerky at 4 am and he actually walked to CVS to get it. CVS closes at 12 but it was the perfect opp to dip out
Did i fall last night when u carried me home.
idk
OHHH yea you fell down the stairs face first
I just found a live peacock hanging out behind the bar. I coerced it into my car and now I have a peacock bro that lives with me.
Randomize
