all ten of us were sitting in his room with the lights off and staring at his colorful moving screensaver for two hours. That high.
is that a crab cake on the shelf with the dvd's....?
Yes, I am about to pass out on my beanbag with a mason jar of wine. Welcome to the south freshmen.
I tried giving you a bj last night and all you could manage was "Haha that tickles" and "in the morning"
Cookies. Watch out fir falling satellites.
One my way home. There was too much fog, strobe lights, and cocaine for my taste.
You called my nipples compassionate. What does that even mean?
I think that thing where I have 2 boyfriends is happening again
im In safeway buying a bottle of Ciroc in short shorts at 3:00 pm on a Monday, yeah I don't know either.
I bought new panties to console myself ... you know, because I am going to lose my ovaries. Well, if I don't die of a heart attack first. But at least when the EMS folks find me, I'll be finely dressed from the waist down.
Where were you last night, and why am I not surprised that drag queens were involved?
I solemnly swear I will not get your boyfriend puke in public drunk again
Got myself invited to boss's family dinner party, drank too much, and fucked boss's brother in his parent's house. Just another Wednesday.
Saw the Peanut butter guy at checkout he had at least 30 containers of it and like 6 different kinds...
Yeah, he fractured his ass by doing a canon ball into the bath tub....
Randomize
