i threw up in over 4 different places last night. it was like a world tour
Good luck! Who knows he might be a stallion in the bedroom! or it could be like having sex with a crayon.
dude, I'm listening to "I believe I can fly", i'm high, and driving. this is so amazing.
yeah you're probably right.. i should stop equating love with getting naked on a webcam for him.
Just ran interference for her again. Sometimes i wonder how many times in my life i'll have to be a cock block at the clinic
Make good choices ;) This is your automated cockblock message
Well, as a member of the greater american southwest gay community I just have to mark this as a total loss and you will be missed.
Just realized I left my heels in their microwave. Whoops.
i just stole a 8 pack of olde english 40s and 2 roles of duct tape. we are going to make edward proud tonight.
Dude this weed smells so good they should make it into a Vicks vapor rub scent and I would rub it all over myself.
I inhaled my own vomit, how was your night?
We were watching sports center while I blew him so we could see the football highlights. I missed fall
I'm trying to find some better sex background music so his neighbors don't hate us. This is tedious.
You were just laying there on the air mattress watching spongebob with a knife. We tried to take it from you, but you insisted it was your emergency escape in case you started to float off.
Where can I buy a stripper pole at midnight on a Sunday?
Randomize
