When do i get to see u next week?
When I teabag your entire family
We are so in love
so when's the next time you get to see your balls
Gym doesn't open till 11. I'm sure that of the other four people waiting in the lobby, I'm the only one still drunk and only going to the gym to shower.
Yeah, we spent most of the evening making fun of the drunk girl until we realized it was you.
After skinny dipping in your pond, I think me and tequila have added a whole new dynamic to our relationship.
it's all just a bunch of faces and i remember what the floor looked like.
He got tattooed, peirced, and we're pretty sure he got rufeed by that fat chick. He was like a walking spring break stereotype.
She was the shot vending machine at the party. But free.
Oh you know, we just bobbed for apples in a bucket full of jungle juice. So, a casual Tuesday night.
took shots off of a myriad of fake boobs last night. It was glorious.
okay yeah but you've seen me eat jambalaya naked
I'm literally rolling on acid for the first time during Thanksgiving. Help me.
You'll love it there. Trust me. Cheap tequila, pretentious beer, tall white guys who will treat you badly. Its got everything you like.
I cut him off because he was changing my thermostat every time he came over
You made the right decision
man do I wish I knew who this naked guy in my room was...
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