your profile still reads that you like women...interesting? I think there is some photography and video that will show otherwise
umm..so Dad's wearing a thong, I don't know what to do
put a dollar in it?
why doesnt he love me? i have tried everything. i even sang to him after sex.
you have got to be kidding?
He started yelling "we're making a baby" mid thrust.. probably not the right guy for me right?
Her sister's ass was worth my getting thrown out of the house.
Bleh. If he hadn't ascended into heaven and sat at the right hand of the father, Jesus would be rolling over in his grave right now.
Is it bad that John just came to my work to have sex with me bc I felt bad that he slept on his porch last night locked out and I missed all his calls?
You have permanently scared my back with your nails. I would like to congratulate you on a job well done.
Seriously wondering if smoking a bowl for lunch was a bad idea.
OR THE BEST. STAY TUNED.
NEVER LET ME DO THIS AGAIN I FEEL LIKE I'M GONNA SHIT MYSELF TO DEATH ARGHHHHHGHHG IS THIS WHAT DYSENTERY FEELS LIKE
How have I seen you throw up on yourself 3 different times, yet we weren't Facebook friends until I accidentally hooked up with your ex?
wanna come over? I have movies.
sure, what movies
porn or disney, your choice
i just got drunk and created an entire Dr Seuss unit for my first graders.
He literally just laid flat on top of me motionless at one point. It felt less like foreplay and more like he was trying to use me as a flotation device. 0/10
Hi darlin, what are you doing tonight?
.... Things I will not be proud of
Randomize