Maybe I lied like you did about your herpes.
guy in front of me on the bus did 12 yrs, hes teling me about how to knife fight
On this egg donor form, it asks "In the past 5 years, have you had sex for drugs or money?" It only gives a yes or no option and no place to explain myself. What do I do?
i literally paused in the middle of it, turned on my light, pointed to the picture netxt to my bed and go "you hooked up with my roommate too!!! AWWW!" he was so weirded out. i don't think he understands the relationship we have..we share..
You "were" hungover, which is past tense. So that gives you no excuse not to go out tonight.
my grandpa is going down the line on this prom picture, and telling me how big everyone's nipples are... he was spot on for me.
I drew a nude short fat middle aged woman today and liked it
It was honestly one of my favorite days in art class except for the 20 min she faced me and kept looking at me and we made eye contact
You don't know how badly I want to just hold you as a soup spoon holds a bisque
What did he say?
NOTHING. GODDAMN HIM AND HIS MAGICAL PENIS!
this relationship shit is hard. like i'd like to be able to watch veep without him trying to dry hump me. also im drunk and its 11 am so
Is it weird that the best sex I've ever had was to Barbara Streisand's Christmas album?
We will walk in fields of dick.
You seriously need to stop quoting those songs when i'm with my parents.
Please clarify that he is speaking of beer pong and not rough sex
Can we start referring to attractive men as "A fine piece of dick?"
I feel like 20 angels jizzed in my mouth. This cupcake is DELICIOUS!
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