You and i never got to the, we dont care what we look like friend-stage. you know? like not brushing your teeth stage.
sorry im really high
Whenever he makes me dinner its always mini things.. cheeseburgers, corndogs.. is he preparing me for something?
Sex on a trampoline was so worth getting a mosquito bite on my penis
you know how i said i wouldn't send that pic message of your lofted bed falling from you fucking a fat chick? that was after i sent it to your mom
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i just sold back the books i vomitted on
my mom just wingman'd for me at a bar. i really don't know what else to say.
every time you want to hook up with a guy who has a girl friend, i'll just give you a freshman
Just witnessed a circumcision at clinical. i suddenly feel a sense of reconciliation over every guy who's done me dirty...
duuuude the clock in this car says its 85 past 19.
dear god, who put you in a cab?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The last party at your house was a sex toy party...it's an obvious transition to baby shower
the saddest part is, this is not even the first time i've woken up in a shopping cart with a concussion.
Passed out mid cig in bed last night. Thank you cough for allowing me legal prescription hydrocodone.
That's not your dick yours is smaller. Nice try.
Wait why do you have a pic of someone else's dick in your phone?
Ladies don't puke and tell
hahahaha classic. this is why you are going to a college with a hospital right next to it
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