I like how you formally end text interactions, just turn your phone off or don't respond you pervert
Is Jonathan Taylor Thomas a gay? I need you to google search it for me. Its important
ah, there's nothing like waking up to picture messages of a strange man's cock. life is good.
haha, that's fucked up. flacid cock pictures are the mental breakfast of champions.
well since you're still married, you will be paying for my abortion right?
it's like a walk of shame rule, you always run into someone who saw you wearing that yesterday
he picked an earring up off the bar floor and tried to give it to girls as a present.
It was huge And he was twirling it around. Im telling you, beautiful wonderpenis
Throwing up in the car while my mom drives, sister holds the bag & my dad holds my hair. This is how my family bonds.
Excuse me while I download incredibly disturbing porn until I'm more ashamed of myself than of my country.
Any day that has a special name thats capitalized means you need to need to call in sick and get day drunk. That's why they are there.
I'm hurting so bad I actially had to wait for my mini wheats to get soggy before I could eat them..
I, soberly, gave myself a concussion trying to take a pic of my vagina. Fuck you and your hangover.
His mom came while we were asleep naked and started asking me about my plans after high school... Is that even a thing.
Hypothetically speaking, if a girl asks you to fuck her wearing only your hockey helmet, is that socially acceptable?
I'm not saying it wasn't great. I'm just saying sleeping with a gassy, depressed,45 year old mother was a different experience. Would do it again though.
Randomize
