Spring semester is just not the same w/o you
if you made me into a cookie and threw me into a betty crocker easy bake oven on christmas morning...that's how baked i am
Because the last time i saw or spoke to him he came all over me in a hammock.
When she talks to me all I hear are 5 generations of inbreeding speaking.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just call Katie. She's like the drunk whisperer; she can get them to do anything.
You're fucking beautiful as shit and we should have loving sex...
I think having a vagina should be considered a skill, give me a break.
I've got the dick your vagina needs, but not the one it deserves right now.
I JUST SEARCHED GINGER COCK ON TUMBLR AND THEY'RE ALL REALLY WELL HUNG? I'M CRYING. IS THIS HOW GINGERS KEEP REPRODUCING?
WHAT IS WRONG WITH YOU?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The guy I hooked up with last night left me alone with his dog AND IT JUST SHIT ON THE FLOOR. WHAT DO I DO
Come over. We have half a bottle of jumbo champagne left and no boyfriends to slow us down
What did we do last night and why in the fuck were there carrots in my pocket?
you know you're doing something right when your drug dealer insists on hugging you before you leave.
Was it a bad idea to have spent all of my tax return on coke?
he broke off the kiss to ask "can I grab your boob?" like props for asking for clear and concise consent but there HAS to be a sexier way to do it
Randomize