i was shrooming and she was sobbing. i was trying to be sympathetic, but i could see the veins working like worms under her skin. and then her face stripped down to the muscle.
what was she crying about?
i wanna say it was the lack of skin on her face but maybe she lost her job.
Drunk. Just jacked off for the third time in an hour. I love not being Catholic anymore.
oh i have no idea about his personality. i imagine it's the same as it was- except now combined with a receding hairline and a beer gut
THERE IS PRACTICALLY A BEER FUCKING WATERFALL
Pitchers of shots should be outlawed. I've puked more than i've breathed in the past half hour.
They let me keep the giant cocktail glass because I threw up in it. And made out with the bartender. Europeans are so generous. I'm getting it engraved
I'm pretty sure at any given moment you could wring out my liver and get a couple of shots of jäger.
It's a drunk scavenger hunt.
Everything on the list counts for double points if done naked.
I came in shy and timid. By the end of the night I hulked out broke two lamps, their coffee table, some plates, and still had sex.
She's on her period. You don't know what fear is.
I wound up running down the street in 12 degree weather in just my bra and then fell asleep cuddling my bottle. You tell me how last night went.
I know I've become a responsible adult because this time, I'm not going to do the drugs I found on the ground
So I sniffed too hard this morning before work and I THINK THE COCAINE JUST STARTED ROUND 2.
I just got yelled at by a stripper for being a tease.
He’s perfect! He listens to Genesis during sex and has a VW bus!
You really are from the panhandle, aren’t you?
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