just smoked a bowl with my history teacher. i love community college
I just ate a cashew that looked EXACTLY like your dick.
He's doing the single life. He recently finished like a 3 year relationship. You can't date him.
But I don't want to date him. I just want to look at him. Naked. And in my bed.
I've gotten 23 condolence texts about Germany's defeat. I got 3 for our break-up. That's how much my friends don't like you.
25 Porn Addicts Admit Their Biggest Pet Peeves
hey quick question, what would you consider to be a "first date" porn?
Thanks for making breakfast. I usually have cereal and coffee...but i think margaritas and turkey sandwiches could catch on.
The only image of you you know is from reflections or pictures. Its 2d. But what other people see is 3d. How do you know that's your real face! MIND.BLOWN.
He's moaning and crying and coughing up something audibly liquid. I can't live in this house any more.
Ran into my neighbor that's always crying. I wonder if she's like; "I ran into my neighbor who's always playing with her vibrator?"
These 23 People Walked In On Someone And Saw Some Crazy Sh*t
One day her vagina is just going to shrivel up and seal itself with it's self preservation mechanism
I knew no one else would have gone along with it since it's morally wrong and probably illegal. You said, "Yes. And let's add fireworks."
I just threw up birthday cake.. who's birthday was it?
You have no idea I looked like the porno version of Laura Ingalls Wilder
I woke up to my bra draped over his lamp and a huge bump on my head. apparently, I face planted while having sex in the shower..
Its a holy bong. We had to bless the holy bong water.